Prince Harry
While not true Royalty, being simply the
residue of Diana's and stableboy James
Hewitt's brief roll in the stable hay ,
Harry is still the most intelligent and
normal of Diana's bastards. But his
future looks bleak and empty as he has
little chance of becoming King.
Prince Harry today spells out his
mission in life: to keep alive the memory
of his mother, Lady Diana, and carry
forward the good work she "didn't quite
finish". What this means, of course, is
that Harry will soon be found dead of a
drug and alcohol overdose in a
prostitute's bed.

His Father, stableboy James Hewitt

The Honeymoon Suite

His Mother, Princess Diana


The horse who saw it all. He later sold his
story to the tabloids.

The drainage pipe where little Harry
was thrown soon after his birth.

The kind gentleman who found the child
and returned him to his parents. His only
reward: a swift kick in the ass.

Prince Harry's Godmother and Godfather
Wendela & Patriot